“Creator Conversation”

c. 2018 Rod Ice

All rights reserved

(3-18)

Morning at the Icehouse.

I had been awake since 1:30 a. m. and was most of the way through a pot of coffee. A severe case of writer’s block had me looking through old files, as yet unfinished, for some sort of inspiration. R. L. Burnside played through the computer speakers at my desk. My Black Lab lay in the living room, snoring like an old man. A mood of futility filled the air.

Suddenly, my vintage Silvertone Model 47 transistor radio began to crackle with purposeful static. Though its batteries were long dead, I could hear strange noises from the atmosphere. Then, a booming voice.

“Rodney! Lo, I am before you!”

I pondered my cup of Maxwell House. Somehow, there must have been whiskey in the pot, not brewed grounds. My imagination seemed to be out of control. But again, I heard the voice. More insistent than before.

“Rodney! I am here with you, my child! Listen to me!”

I looked around the room, nervously. The apparition in my radio sounded eerily like… God. Or at least what I imagined such an omnipotent being would sound like in vocal terms. I grabbed a pen and paper to scribble notes, feeling like Edgar Cayce receiving his first revelation. Then, I called out in response. And our conversation began:

ME: “Hello?”

GOD: “Behold, the Great Spirit of your Cherokee ancestors is nigh. Elohim, Heavenly Father, Allah, Deus, Krishna, Akal Purakh, Cosmic Intelligence, call me by whatever name you wish. My messengers are Abraham, Jesus, Muhammad, Buddah, the Dalai Lama, Jah Ras Tafari...”

ME: (Bowing my head) “Wow, these old transistor devices were made to last forever.”

GOD: “Be not deceived! The radio is silent. It is ‘The Great I Am’ who speaks to you!”

ME: “I must need more coffee.”

GOD: “What you need is more faith, my son!”

ME: “Right. Okay, forgive my skepticism. Welcome then, to my humble abode.”

GOD: “I have come because you seek enlightenment. Your plea was heard all the way to eternity. That of a suitor for knowledge. I am before you to offer understanding. Are you ready?”

ME: “I asked for enlightenment?”

GOD: “I see you wandering, my son. Seeking to bolster your belief. You once observed that a conversation with me would be useful if any question could be asked. So be it, I am here and you may inquire at will. Ask away!”

ME: “Yeah, I did say something like that in a fit of befuddlement. You know, current events and all of that...”

GOD: “Knowing all is my business, Rodney!”

ME: “Right. I guess that goes with the job.”

GOD: “What answers do you seek?”

ME: “Well you know, the usual stuff. Why does a loving creator permit war, famine, suffering, death and ill-advised Hollywood movie remakes. I suppose you’ve heard that frequently...”

GOD: “Oh yes. An infinite number of times.”

ME: “Wondering if you really whisper in the ears of Jimmy Carter, George W. Bush, Mike Pence or those experiencing a spiritual mind trip on peyote or ganja...”

GOD: “My message is for every child. I have no favorites.”

ME: “Okay, wondering then about those who loudly pray and follow ritualism… but worship money, not you.”

GOD: (Sighing heavily) “I judge the heart. Not a scorecard or club membership. Not on the basis of a wardrobe. But, those are common thoughts. Do you have anything more unique?”

ME: “Well… curious about a creator that could conjure up a universe full of pain, sin and evil when his message is supposedly the opposite?”

GOD: “Rodney, it is the nature of being made in my image. I created the human race with free will, modeled from my own. My intent was to let you choose whether to live in the light of fellowship or to serve the darkness. Each of us decides which way to turn. Thus, no one is condemned except by their own actions. My plan is at work every day.”

ME: “Yeahhhh… that seems to have gone awry especially after the invention of social media.”

GOD: (Quieting his tone) “I have to admit that Facebook sometimes gives me the shivers. But as I say, the plan must remain in motion.”

ME: (Laughing) “Your plan? Or the one of Mark Zuckerberg?”

GOD: “I gave life to all of you. The choice is yours as to how that gift is used. Even Zuckerberg must decide.”

ME: “Right, I get the big picture. You wind up the toys and let them go...”

GOD: “Rodney, there must be more than this sort of banter on your mind. These observations have been voiced thousands upon thousands of times. I am the keeper of eternity, the maker of all things. ‘Abba’ before my name was stolen by a Swedish pop group. What question waits in your heart? To know about eternal life? Or the true story of UFOs? Perhaps who killed John F. Kennedy? Or how the Cleveland Browns have been so bad for so long?”

ME: “Well, one answer if you please… why Donald Trump? Why?”

GOD: (Irritated) “Okay! I get that one a lot lately.”

ME: “Not looking for an argument. Just… why?”

GOD: “As I said before, the earthly plan was set in to motion many years ago. I must let it run until the end. This is the choice that I made at its inception.”

ME: “Half of my family voted for Trump.”

GOD: “Of course, I knew that already.”

ME: “Like you know the winning lottery numbers. And who will go to the Super Bowl next year.”

GOD: “Rodney, if you can’t do better than that for an observation, I am headed back to eternity.”

ME: “Wait! Wait! My family is so religious that I can’t even drink a beer in their presence. But they supported a guy known for porn stars, three marriages, extra-marital affairs, harassment, bad business deals, rage, coarse language, prevarication and an inflated ego. Plus, a horrible spray-on tan. I am baffled.”

GOD: “I can see that on your face.”

ME: “Is this what you want?”

GOD: “What I want is for believers to follow me of their own free will.”

ME: “You aren’t going to answer the riddle?”

GOD: “I already have. Listen with your heart.”

There was a flash in the dim light of my home office. The Sears & Roebuck radio squawked and sputtered with electrical energy. Then, went silent. I sat at my desk for a few minutes, tuning around the dial. But the effort was fruitless. My celestial visitor had gone. 

Now, it was time for more coffee.

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